“Happy Birthday to One, Happy Birthday to One, Happy 70th Birthday His Royal Highness, Happy Birthday to One!”
70 years old today, or 18 with 52 years worth of experience. It really does feel strange to be well and truly past retirement age without actually starting work yet. One’s entire life has been “your application is being processed”. Bloody hell, time flies when you’re royal. Continue reading
Posted in Royalty
Tagged 70th, Birthday, Camilla, Charles, Elizabeth, funny, Harry, parody, Prince, Queen, Twitter, William
Mummy is 90 years old today, showing no visible signs of ever slowing down.
She is the longest serving monarch in British history, having reigned on the throne for 64 years and 4 months (23,451 days, and 16 hours; roughly the length of an average game of Monopoly). The longest time one has spent on the Royal throne is approximately 45 mins, after eating a dodgy burger at the Middletons family gathering in 2011.
Dear Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana of Cambridge,
Congratulations, you have just been born a Royal subject, On Her Majesty’s Secret Cervix, and have therefore won life’s lottery. Continue reading
Posted in Letters
Tagged Baby, Britishness, Charles, Charles_HRH, Charlotte, Diana, Elizabeth, funny, Harry, Kate, Letter, Lindo, London, Middleton, Open, parody, Prince, Princess, Queen, Royal, Star, Twitter, Wars, William
Mother has returned home after staying in hospital with a stomach bug. She’d been on the throne all weekend. Quite frankly that’s the last time she’ll eat a sodding lasagne. Continue reading