74 years in the making, but one thing we couldn’t prepare for was the rain pissing on one’s parade. Sent a text to the Pope this morning to see if anything could be done, but still waiting for an answer. It’s hard to defend the faith with this weather.
Christmas is a time when we are reminded that no matter what difficulties we face in our daily lives, there’s almost always people worse off than us. And they’re usually French. It is a time for firsts, as this will be our first Christmas without one’s dear mummy and papa. Queen Elizabeth II reigned over us for 70 glorious years, having met 15 different UK Prime Ministers. It’s entirely possible one could beat that record by Christmas 2023!
For over 65 years, one’s papa Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh, had been the unwavering presence alongside Britain’s longest-serving monarch, who even referred to himself as the “world’s most experienced plaque unveiler.”
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s decision to ‘step down’ as ‘senior members’ of the British Royal Family, and split their time between the UK and Canada has come as a complete shock. No one has successfully managed to break up a powerful British group since Yoko Ono. Continue reading →
By the highest odds imaginable, you have avoided being conceived within an artificial sovereign family such as the Kardashians or the Beckhams, and have placed yourself in the covetable position of 7th in line* to the throne of the British Royal Family.
“Happy Birthday to One, Happy Birthday to One, Happy 70th Birthday His Royal Highness, Happy Birthday to One!”
70 years old today, or 18 with 52 years worth of experience. It really does feel strange to be well and truly past retirement age without actually starting work yet. One’s entire life has been “your application is being processed”. Bloody hell, time flies when you’re royal. Continue reading →
Congratulations on winning the eBay listing of Prince Harry, via the ‘Buy It Now’ option. Firstly, one would like to commend you for agreeing to marry into a genuine Royal Family, and not an artificial one like the Kardashians. Continue reading →