Tag Archives: Harry

One’s letter to Meghan Markle

Dear Meghan Markle,

Congratulations on winning the eBay listing of Prince Harry, via the ‘Buy It Now’ option. Firstly, one would like to commend you for agreeing to marry into a genuine Royal Family, and not an artificial one like the Kardashians. Continue reading

One’s letter to Princess Charlotte

Dear Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana of Cambridge,

Congratulations, you have just been born a Royal subject, On Her Majesty’s Secret Cervix, and have therefore won life’s lottery. Continue reading

Royal Christmas Tips

Christmas is a time for expensive traditions. Greeting cards for people you see every week, presents you don’t need/want, food that upsets your stomach, and decorations that are a fire hazard.

As the day rapidly approaches, many of you will be dreading spending time stuck in a house with your nearest and dearest, munching on the dried out bird that gets a good stuffing once a year. The key to getting through Christmas successfully is drinking the right amount of alcohol, without becoming violent, but enough to block out reality. Continue reading