Category Archives: Politics

Fifty Shades of Sue Gray – ‘Partygate’ report

Here is an exclusive look at Sue Gray’s 1,865 paged report into the alleged parties at Downing Street. It would have been far easier for her to investigate the days there weren’t any parties.

The only party one will be having with Boris Johnson in attendance is his leaving party (tbc).

The Darling Buddies of May

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“Your brother named his band after me”.

David Cameron phoned yesterday to say he “leaves Britain a much stronger country”. It’s his sense of humour one’s going to miss the most. He left 10 Downing Street for the last time at 16:48pm to receive his P45 from the Queen, only to return at 16:53pm after leaving one of his children behind.
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The PM Factor and Results

“Government – a collective group of people that exist for the purposes of increasing debt, widening the gap between the rich and poor, and funding world domination projects such as Europe. Newly elected Governments tend not to solve problems, only to rearrange them”

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No, Camilla, Abu Qatada is not “a song from The Lion King”

Absolutely sodding freezing. Might import some sunshine from Cyprus, who appear to be having a half price sale at the moment.

David Miliband phoned to say he’s leaving the Labour Party to spend less time with his family. He’s decided to join an organisation called International Rescue. From one bunch of puppets to another. He really must’ve pulled a few strings to land that job. Continue reading

Budget 2013

George Osborne decided to join Twitter this morning. Of all sodding days to choose. He tweeted a picture of himself busily writing his speech (economics homework) with the red budget box (his lunchbox) on the table. Poor boy hasn’t been abused this much since leaving school last year.  Continue reading

Credit Rating from AAA to LOL

The UK’s credit rating has been downgraded from AAA. One initially thought this was due to Prince Harry over spending in Las Vegas, but evidentially it’s the morons at Number 10.

Mr Clegg text to say he doesn’t see a problem losing AAA when RAC are better anyway. Not replying. Continue reading