Tag Archives: Letter

One’s letter to Prince Louis

Dear Prince Louis Arthur Charles of Cambridge,

By the highest odds imaginable, you have avoided being conceived within an artificial sovereign family such as the Kardashians or the Beckhams, and have leapfrogged to the covetable position of 5th in line* to the throne of the British Royal Family.

*And do trust one when I say, it’s a bloody slow moving line. Continue reading

One’s letter to Meghan Markle

Dear Meghan Markle,

Congratulations on winning the eBay listing of Prince Harry, via the ‘Buy It Now’ option. Firstly, one would like to commend you for agreeing to marry into a genuine Royal Family, and not an artificial one like the Kardashians. Continue reading

One’s letter to Princess Charlotte

Dear Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana of Cambridge,

Congratulations, you have just been born a Royal subject, On Her Majesty’s Secret Cervix, and have therefore won life’s lottery. Continue reading